Christians wouldn't act that way - really!

Really: How do they act:

You have a “I love Jesus sticker on your bumper” and you pass me going twice the speed limit in a school zone.

I look in my rear view mirror and I cannot tell if you are pushing me or following me, but you do have a cross hanging from your rear view mirror.

You have a “What would Jesus do?” sticker on your rear window and I am sitting behind you watching you blow your horn and shoot the finger at someone taking too long at the stop sign.

You leave church an when you get to the parking lot you see someone has parked too close to your car and the first thing that comes out of your mouth is “Goddamn fool”.  I witness that two Sundays ago.

Its almost laughable when I see people at church (my neighbor) treating others as if they were mortal enemies. Gossiping behind others backs, silently and verbally wishing for their failure, and coveting their possessions.

There’s nothing wrong with a friendly debate among people of the same or different denominations…but when you end up telling me I am not a Christian because I am Catholic and insist on holding it against me…then you have forgotten what Christianity is all about.

When you post Bible verses on my email and go to church each week and I know you are married and using a singles site on the Internet. It makes me question if I even want to be a Christian.

How do you think you’ll ever be able to convince someone that they should investigate Christianity if their only interaction with Christianity is you and you demonstrate qualities even the unbeliever does not want to have.  Have you ever considered that you’re actually hurting Christ more than helping Him with how you treat others? Do you really think that showing up on Sunday and listening to the band or singing in the choir is going to bring others to Christ?

Christ said that you should “let your light so shine” so that others will want to come unto Him. Is your shining light a a red warning light to avoid Christians? Perhaps you are like a fire hydrant extinguishing any light that might be burning faintly within others.

If you call yourself a Christian…then just start loving others and overlooking their faults. Stop trying to make everyone else pay for their sins. God’s got that under control. Become an ambassadors of mercy instead of trying to replace God by being judge and jury. If you make that change you’ll never have to beg someone to listen to your message about Christ again.

There’s not a day that goes by when I don’t see some conservative going on and on about how the Republican party is the party of “good Christian values” and everyone else (specifically liberals) is waging some kind of war on religion. Going to church doesn’t make someone a Christian. Christianity is based on a belief in Jesus Christ and one’s attempt to live their life based on the values for which He taught.

I have really noticed from the comments following the Orlando shooting on social sites and media sites how many conservative Christians base their devotion to their faith on how strong their opposition is to homosexuality.

These are some other things that I have really noticed over the last eight years -Prosperity minsters make all Christians sound like our religion is based on GREED. It seems some Christians believe Jesus Christi would have an AR-15 strapped to His back - that is not a Christian issue that is a political issue. Christians should be  teaching acceptance and tolerance of others, but many are not.  That we’re all humans and it seems some have forgotten that - we all sin.  That we should treat each other with respect and kindness - calling others derogatory names does not seem to fulfill that Christian obligation. Some of the comments certainly do not reflect love and kindness.  Many Christians seem to have forgotten that whole “love our neighbor” thing. Do we should think we should try and FORCE our beliefs on others and judge them stupid heathens if they do not agree with us - God does not - that is why God gave us ‘free will". God gave us the right to choose to believe or not believe. God said “fear not” why are so many Christians on social media sites expressing fear of those that do not agree with their beliefs – I have faith God will prevail. 

Our actions outside of church are what matters the most to others wanting what we claim to have.

Wounded Warrior Project - SCAM OR NOT?

News reported this week by CBS News and the New York Times claims the Wounded Warrior Project is spending large amounts of money on advertising, lavish parties, and executive salaries, but it is not spending much money to help veterans.

The scandal was supposedly uncovered by an investigation conducted by Charity Navigator, the nation's largest and most-utilized evaluator of charities. Charity Navigator gathers its information from the Federal Tax Reports filed by the charities. According to Charity Navigator, the Wounded Warrior Project spends less than 60 percent of its total expenses on the programs and services it delivers to veterans.  I think it is important to note that Charity Navigator does not INVESTIGATE any charity organization. It only makes reports from the tax forms that the charity organizations submit to the Federal Government.

Thomas Mangan of the Rochester Independent Examiner claims Donald Trump skipped the last Republican Debate on Fox to attend a Wounded Warrior fund raising project. That is not true so it makes me question if the reports on the Wounded Warrior project are all true. Wounded Warrior did not receive any funds from the Trump veteran fund raisers. He claimed it was a “Wounded Warrior Fund Raising Project” that is not true. It was a Donald Trump veteran’s fund raiser. He claims Trump knew about the scandal and went ahead and supported the Wounded Warrior fund raiser, again untrue. Trump refused to share the money with Wounded Warrior because of the scandal. Trump stated before and after the fund raiser he would not be donating any funds to Wounded Warrior until the scandal was cleared up.

Army Staff Sgt. Erick Millette worked with the Wounded Warrior Project for two years before he quit because of his disillusionment with the way the Wounded Warrior Project spends the money that people donated to the charity. Millette told CBS News, “Their mission is to honor and empower wounded warriors, but what the public doesn’t see is how they spend their money.” Millette said that the Wounded Warrior Project is little more than a scam to bring in money to spend on extravagant and luxurious parties, as well as other non-veteran-related expenses such as the salaries for the charities employees” – (organizations need employees and employees need to be paid) . Millette told CBS, “Donors don’t want you to have a $2,500 bar tab. Donors don’t want you to fly every staff member once a year to some five-star resort and whoop it up and call it team building.” If what Millette says is true he is correct donors, including me, do not want donated funds wasted. But, Millette would not be the first disgruntled employee that exaggerated truths or lied about a previous employee.

Wounded Warrior was criticized for spending money to sue other charity organizations for using their name in fund raisers and advertising. I cannot fault them for that. If I was on the board of any charity organization I would want to protect the name of the charity I was involved with. I would not want the public donating money to another charity thinking they were donating to the organization I represented. Dishonest charities often play off the names of well-known organizations in order to confuse donors.

Kids Wish Network, Children's Wish Foundation International and Wishing Well Foundation all of the names sound like the original, Make-A-Wish Foundation, which does not hire professional telemarketers. Make-a-Wish officials say they spend many, many hour’s yearly fielding complaints from people who were solicited by sound-alike charities.

If Wounded Warrior has gone bad since 2009 they unfortunately would not be the first. CBS and Times claim Wounded Warrior only spent 60% of the funds collected on direct aid. Take a look at other charities that most of us at some time or another have contributed to and there are many more worse than these:

Kids Wish Network – collected $137.9 - spent on direct aid $115.9 million - 2.5%

Cancer Fund of America - $86.8 million - $75.4 million - 1.0%

Children's Wish Foundation International - $92.7 million - $61.2 million - 10.6%

Firefighters Charitable Foundation - $62.8 million - $53.8 million - 7.4%

Intl. Union of Police Association, AFL-CIO - $66.6 million - $50.4 million - 0.5%

Breast Cancer Relief Foundation - $63.9 million - $44.8 million - 2.2%

American Association of State Troopers - $48.1 million - $38.6 million - 8.9%

National Veterans Service Fund - $70.2 million - $36.9 million - 7.8%

Children's Cancer Fund of America - $43.7 million - $34.4 million - 4.6%

Committee for Missing Children - $26.6 million - $23.5 million - 0.8%

Association for Firefighters and Paramedics - $24.0 million - $21.4 million - 3.1%  

United States Deputy Sheriffs' Association - $25.6 million - $17.9 million - 0.8%   

National Cancer Coalition - $42.1 million - $16.4 million - 1.3%

American Foundation For Disabled Children - $15.8 million - $13.4 million - 0.6%

Heart Support of America -$31.4 million - $12.9 million - 3.1%

Police Protective Fund - $37.7 million - $12.2 million - 0.7%

 Veterans Assistance Foundation - $12.4 million - $11.1 million - 10.4%

Children's Charity Fund - $14.0 million - $10.3 million - 2.4%

The Veterans Fund - $12.6 million - $10.2 million - 2.5%

Wishing Well Foundation USA - $12.6 million - $10.1 million - 4.3%

Children's Leukemia Research Association - $9.8 million - $6.8 million - 11.1%

The 50 worst charities in America devote less than 4 percent of donations raised to direct cash aid. Some charities give even less. Over a decade, one diabetes charity raised nearly $14 million and gave about $10,000 to patients. Six spent nothing at all on direct cash aid. Several watchdog organizations say charities should spend no more than 35 percent of the money they raise on fundraising expenses, but that amount does not include salaries paid to employees. If they are correct I guess we have to decide is 5% for WWP salaries acceptable.

It does not make sense to me that a charity with major corporate sponsors such as U-Haul, Bank of America, Raytheon, NFL, Heinz and many others would allow the WWP to use their name and fund their events if they were in fact a scam. It is even more puzzling to me that Bill O’Reilly of FOX would not know if WWP was a fraud. Bill O’Reilly is a big supporter of WWP and generally appears to be very careful to protect his personal name.

The Better Business Bureau rates WWP as meeting their standards and has only had 3 complaints in the past 36 months and all three complaints have been answered by WWP in a manner that satisfied The Better Business Bureau. WWP meets all 20 BBB standards for charity accountability.

Brian Kolfage - A Wounded Warrior - an Air Force veteran and a triple amputee who was wounded in Iraq said he found it appalling to read the horrible things that the Wounded Warrior Project is being accused of and that he did not believe the accusations.

Another thing that concerns me is that a vast majority of the accusation against WWP comes from people who refuse to speak on the record and claim they are afraid of the power that Wounded Warrior Project has. This sounds a bit melodramatic to me.

One disgruntle veteran who would not give his name said, “Everything they do is a dog-and-pony show, and I haven’t talked to one (NOT ONE has been help by WWP) of my fellow veterans that were injured… actually getting any help from the Wounded Warrior Project. I’m not just talking about financial assistance; I'm talking about help, period”.  

The disgruntle veteran claimed all he got from WWP was a backpack maybe he did not know The Wounded Warrior Project was founded in 2002 by John Melia and his friends and family. Melia himself was severely wounded while serving in Somalia in 1992. Until March of 2005, WWP operated as a part of the United Spinal Association and is referred to as "United Spinal Associations Wounded Warrior Project."

Its first project was delivering backpacks containing personal supplies to the bedside of wounded warriors. The backpacks include "essential care and comfort items such as clothing, toiletries, calling card and playing cards, etc. all designed to make their hospital stay more comfortable." Melia remembered when he first arrived at the hospital after his injuries he arrived with none of these types of items. WWP started with just six friends packing backpacks to provide items to wounded services warriors at Walter Reed Medical Center and continues the practice to stay in touch with their roots. I would also think that most of the veterans in the hospital appreciated the backpacks and I also think these backpacks and items cost WWP money.

 I know some would object to WWP’s 2014 IRS report which stated $473,015 or   0.19% (less than 1%) of donations was paid to Steven Nardizzi Executive Director. I do not. I have worked in non-profit organizations and I know the importance of having someone at the top that is an expert in fund raising and managing non-profit organizations.  There is a fundamental misunderstanding in the public arena about what it really costs to run an effective nonprofit.

Charity Navigator one of the most respected watchdogs of non-profit organizations gave them the most 4 stars for “Accountability and Transparency”.  I stated earlier that 35% spent on fund raisings was acceptable and WWP spent 34% in 2014 on fundraising.  Charity Navigator gave it three out of four stars overall.

A 2013 independent investigation by the Tampa Bay Times and the Center for Investigative Reporting reported that the charity spent 58 percent of donations directly on veterans’ programs. That year, the figure WWP self-reported was 73 percent. Tampa Bay Times admitted they did not count literature handed out to veterans as direct aid and WWP did. I would consider literature that advises veterans of various aid programs that is available to them, how to write a resume, information on medicines and therapy is charity.

A lot of the veterans that complained are now affiliated with other veteran charity organizations. How much of their criticism is merely jealousy of WWP success and merely fear that WWP was eating up their donor dollars. Believe me when I say there is tremendous jealousy and competition among charity organizations – I know after 46 years in the industry.

At this time I do not believe The Wounded Warrior Project is a scam, nor an ill-meaning charity. Even its fiercest detractors admit that WWP has the right motives, even if they believe WWP can be a lot more effective. We can all do better!  I admit WWP Wounded Warrior Project has room for improvement.

I will not stop supporting WWP at this time. I will wait until it is proven to me that it is not a worthwhile organization. If and when it is proven I will chalk it up to another attempt at doing good gone bad – GREED! 

Do politicians really care about the sick and elderly?

Why does U.S. law require perfectly good medicine that could be given to the poor and elderly be destroyed?

In the eighties and early nineties a group of us violated the law and risk being arrested picking up the medication of people who died of A.I.D.S. and passing it on to those living with A.I.D.S. who could not afford medication. We would have someone stay at the home when we knew the patient was about to die and secure the medicine before public health care workers arrived.

Public health care workers, nursing homes and hospices must destroy medicines of deceased patients according to U.S. law. Nursing homes, public health care workers, and hospices must also destroy unused medicine when doctors prescribe a new medication or stop a medication. Some medications can be sent back to the pharmacy if the facility has an in-house pharmacy, but most medicines (hundreds of pounds daily) are destroyed.

In my opinion this profits no one but the pharmaceutical companies. The government claim they are protecting Americans from outdated medication or possible errors in distribution. Ask someone who cannot afford to purchase their medications because of insurance co-pays or do not have insurance if they would prefer the medicine to be destroyed or distributed by charitable organizations or selected pharmacy’s for free or a low cost. In a free society why don’t the people in need of these medications have a choice?  

There are people who have to choose each month whether they will buy medications or buy groceries. It is estimated 50 million people in the U.S. fail to fill needed prescriptions each year because of the cost.

Some with cardiovascular disease have said they take less medicine than prescribed due to cost and fifty percent of them were more likely to experience angina, strokes or non-fatal heart attacks. For many others, cutting back on medicine led to faster health declines, increased hospitalizations and premature death.

Even Medicare Part D medication is destroyed. Why can’t the government devise a program where the medication is returned to a government pharmacy (Veteran Administration) and be utilized. This would save millions of Medicare Part D funds yearly. Is this because the pharmaceutical companies do not want such programs developed?

Injectable drugs in syringes packed in tamper proof packaging are destroyed. I do not understand why medication in tamper proof packaging must be destroyed. It seems to me to be a total waste. The government claims they do not want these drugs to fall into the hands of the wrong people who may abuse them.

The D.E.A. destroyed 6400 pounds of medication picked up in one week in nursing homes and long care centers in two counties in the state of New York. Nationwide they collected and destroyed 742,497 pounds last year. This does not include medication facilities that were allowed to destroy unused medications in-house. I cannot even make an intelligent guess of what 742,497 pounds of prescription drugs would cost retail, but I am sure it would be in the billions of dollars.

There is a nonprofit organization called Sirum, which was founded by three young Stanford graduates who use the internet to try and match patient and medicine.  Their goal is to save lives by saving unused medications. They are using technology to bridge this gap between surplus and need. The medications are sent to selected clinics to be distributed. They charge 25% of the retail cost for the drugs they recycle.

Forty states have enacted laws authorizing the reuse of medication. The State of Iowa recycled $52 million in unused drugs to the poor last year. These programs are small and are State authorized and not authorized by the Federal government.  Change is coming, but it is slow because people fear recourse from the Federal government.  Few in the medical industry know about these small recycle programs and only about 25 medications are allowed to be recycled.

Previously sold, but unused medication, brought back to special pharmacies for resale or donation could provide a low-cost source for patent protected medicines. Pharmacies in Mexico and Canada are doing brisk business from Americans crossing the borders to buy medicine. Internet pharmacies are also doing a brisk business in the United States selling both reimported American made medications and low-cost foreign-made products. Which do you think is safer foreign made medications without government regulations or recycled American medications with government regulations that are perfectly good? 

Other countries have opted for pharmaceutical price controls and/or curtailing patent protection, but such actions run counter to American free-market ideology and political realities. Plus lobbyist are too strong in the United States to ever allow this to happen. 

Leftover drugs prescribed for American patients with HIV are now being recycled for use overseas. 'Aid for AIDS in Manhattan' — a nonprofit group with branches in Italy, Spain and Switzerland collects drugs after US patients with HIV switch prescriptions, stop medications, or die. The group passes these very expensive retroviral medicines along to more than 500 people with HIV throughout Africa, the Caribbean, and Latin America. American law makes it illegal to redistribute these medications to the poor in the United States, but says nothing about exporting them. If these drugs are not safe for Americans to take then why is our government allowing people in Third World Countries to take them?

Nursing homes and other healthcare facilities are not the only possible sources of recyclable medicines. A more important source may be medication in consumers' homes that is unused. As I said earlier we collected thousands of dollars of medications in homes. 

“Expired medication” also represents a potentially large source of supply of medicine for a recycling program. As things stand now, expiration dates get a lot of emphasis. For instance, there is a campaign, cosponsored by some drug retailers, that urges people to discard tablets or capsules when they reach the date on the label. It turns out that the date on the label is often much earlier than the official expiration date. Pharmaceutical companies admit most drugs would be okay to use 18 to 24 months after the expiration date.  Very expensive medications are being dumped, being wasted.

Obviously, much discussion and planning is needed before medicine recycling could become a reality on a large scale for example new laws, regulations about what might be recycled, individual pill packaging for the selected items, rules about who might be eligible to return medication, who might be able to purchase it, rules for exchanging the old pills for a new prescription and how to pay for the infrastructure support.

It might be wise to concentrate at first on recycling from nursing homes and other facilities where there is an unbroken chain of accountability for the medicine. Such medication has never been out of the hands of accountable healthcare workers, and there is a clear trail of when it was purchased for whom and why it was not used. Recycled medicine would have to be individually packaged or still in its sealed original container.

Federal law could be changed. Individual tablet and capsule tamper-resistant packaging, including bar code identification of manufacturer, date of manufacture, expiration date, medication name, and dosage would bring us close to the possibility of recycling appropriately chosen medications. Such a system, combined with appropriate safeguards to assure product authenticity, is worth discussing.

We will never know if any plan for medicine recycling can be safely done unless we begin the discussion. This means we would have to overcome the greed of pharmaceutical corporations and retailers of medication. 

 

Will you again believe the lies of politicians and once again be disappointed?

The next elections are not that far away.  It is not too early to start listening closely to what the candidates are saying and if they have a record to investigate what they have done in the past. Regardless of their party affiliation all politicians make big promises.

How many of these promises are just bold-faced lies that you have heard many times in the past?  It is unfortunate that voters are more likely to believe statements made by their own political party, even if they’re totally false. Politicians make big promises they know they cannot keep because the lies work. They work because they say what people want to hear and not what is realistic. They give hopeless people false hope!  They feed the greed of greedy people.   If they make promises their audience wants to hear they can secure campaign money and win more votes. Voters have short memories if they are elected and fail to keep their promises people forget. President Obama proved that. He failed to keep his promises in his first term and was reelected.

Some politicians have learnt the art of telling half-truths or they have become experts at making excuses and blaming others. Again President Obama is a perfect example of that.

We need to learn the political language:

When a politician says “I will try” it does not mean he or she will. You can say you’ll “try to do the dishes,” even if you never get off the couch, technically you are not lying. “Try” is a great word for taking a stance that doesn’t actually require the politician to carry out any action.

When politicians are hot on the campaign trail, they’re willing to say just about anything to get votes. The words “I am committed to” flow freely. Committed to end poverty, increase jobs, improve education, end corruption, etc. If they say I promise to and don’t voters get turned off, but saying committed to does not sound like a promise to voters.

When a politician says, “The people are my biggest priority “you should start doubting all of his or her words. A politician’s biggest priority is to make sure they don’t turn off voters prior to the election. If that means making cuts, raising taxes, or prioritizing the demands of corporate lobbyists over your welfare once elected, they’ll do it. They will do it because there is always another election that they want to win.

Once a politician gets to the primaries or takes office, they’re going to have to make compromises, even if it means going back on their original agenda. They know that! When a candidate tells you, “I will not compromise on my political or moral views” take that to mean he or she is lying to you.

When a politician plants an idea in your mind, even a false one, you don’t forget it. That’s why we still joke that Al Gore thinks he invented the Internet, rumors circulated that Bill Clinton and John McCain fathered illegitimate children, and 20% of Americans don’t think Obama is a U.S. citizen. Politicians are well aware of this trick, and they use it to smear their opponents. Even if their claims are completely false they do not care. They have one goal win at all cost. Also know that the bias media does the same thing. Look at what the media is doing to Dr. Carson in the U.S.

You need to know that when politicians deny allegations made against them their denial could be a lie. Bill Clinton lied about his affair with Monica Lewinsky under oath.  Presidential candidate John Edwards continually denied having an extramarital affair. Then, in a 2008 when his political career was over he admitted to the affair. He lied for two more years that he had fathered a child during that relationship. Nixon said, “I’m not a crook.” Turns out, he was. In 1974, Nixon was ordered to repay over $400,000 in back taxes to the IRS for making incorrect deductions.

I said earlier politicians are good at blaming others well consider the following: Anthony Weiner claimed in an interview that his “system was hacked.” He only admitted the scandalous photos were him once the women started coming out and telling their stories.  Politician Michael Grimm when he was under federal investigation for two years for allegations related to campaign finance fraud claimed government prosecutors had a “politically driven vendetta against” him. He eventually pleaded guilty.

Politicians are experienced wordsmiths. They spend a lot of time raising campaign money, getting votes, and striking deals. They know how to spin a story to get what they want, and they have the resources they need to cover up past offenses. When their office and reputation is at stake, the ends sometimes justify the means.

t is important that the citizens remember if the people are corrupt their politicians will be corrupt. Corrupt people elect corrupt politicians. We should examine ourselves before we vote and make sure our own selfish greed and immorality are not influencing our vote. The needs of the nation as a whole are more important than our personal needs.

 

 

Is there major corruption in Christian Prosperity Ministries?

The senior pastor of Singapore's second-largest mega church bowed three times to his congregation and apologized. Is he sorry that he misappropriated 35.9 million U.S. dollars (some say $50 million) of the churches funds or is he sorry that he and his board members were caught? I suppose only those involved and God know the answer to that.

Last week, Kong Hee and five other leaders of his 17,000-member City Harvest Church were found guilty by Singapore's charity commissioner of siphoning church funds to support the singing career of Kong's wife and church co-founder, Sun Ho, in the United States and Asia. The mega church maintains that Ho's pop music was intended as a form of outreach to non-Christians. The 17,000 membership at the home church does not reflect accurately the number of members in the organization because they have 48 multiple sites which have approximately 59,000 members.

CHC is Singapore’s second largest mega church that preaches a prosperity gospel.  A prosperity Gospel generally makes the Pastor and those on the inside very rich by telling the people their giving to the church will bring them abundant blessing’s from God. In other words the more they give the more they get from God. Corruption runs wild in these prosperity ministries. This teaching is unbiblical, but it is successful in making it possible for some men and women of God to live in multi-million dollar homes, travel in private jets, stay in the finest hotels as they travel the world and drive the most expensive automobiles.

Ho’s secular music career was launched in 2002 as a “Crossover Project,” meant to reach non-Christians and expand the church. Ho, was not charged and is still the megachurch's executive director. Ho has five albums in Taiwan, and appeared in a few hip hop albums in the United States beginning in 2003. A decade ago she became a full-time pop singer wearing skimpy outfits and doing provocative gyrations to accent her music ability.

In 2012, six church leaders were arrested and charged with misusing church building funds to promote Ho’s career. The Commissioner of Charities accused Kong of diverting funds under the guise of contributions to a sister church in Kuala Lumpur, and one witness testified that building funds were used to buy investment bonds in church-owned companies that promoted Ho’s music career. The megachurch also purchased $500,000 in unsold albums to boost her ratings before her American debut. Perhaps she should have tried to launch her singing career on America’s Got Talent or Asia’s Got Talent.

To this day the six profess they do not think they did anything wrong and that the members of the church did or would approve of any use they made of church funds. The pastor maintains no member has come up to him and said he has done anything wrong or that they felt deceived. It is hard for me to believe that the six and Hee’s wife did not know they were acting dishonestly. If they were not trying to hide what they were using the funds for they would have been straight forward and not claimed before being caught the funds were used to build churches in Indonesia.

They now claim to have new people running the operation and a new board, but Hee’s wife is still Executive Director of the organization. They got rid of the underlings and kept the one that was smart enough or shrew enough not to be indicted.

I will concede that part of the problem could have been cultural. Church-sponsored outreach projects—like films or crossover artists performing both religious and secular music are strange to Singapore non-Christian church goers. It is a common practice in the United States. Bishop T.D. Jake’s owns secular media production companies. Daystar television ministries promote and produce crossover music festivals all the time.

There appears to still be thousands of gullible young Singaporeans Church members that have closed ranks, claiming that they approve of their leaders’ spending. The CHC’s building fund alone raised $23m (U.S. Dollars) last year after the deception was known and the trial had begun. They seem to trust Mr. Hee to spend their money in any way he sees fit. Local activists also acknowledge that the church contributes much to the community.

Still, the case has revealed a lack of accountability and transparency at religious organizations. Worshippers often place blind faith in their church leaders, showing little interest in where their tithes and donations go, but hasn’t the public known that for more than two decades. GREED leads people to believe in false hopes and I guess that will never change. We also must remember they prey on those that have lost hope and are experiencing financial difficulties.

You may be wondering how Pastor Kong Hee’s secret got out; well a disgruntled church member Roland Poon made public allegations in 2003 that the funds were being misused to bankroll Hee’s wife’s music career. Instead of church members thanking Mr. Poon they are shunning him. They should have paid him a “whistle blower” fee. In the state of Texas you see signs all along the highways that read “Don’t mess with Texas”. The CHC Christian’s motto should become, “DON’T MESS WITH OUR CHURCH LEADERS.”

Why do people expect more than they are willing to give?

I received an email from a woman that I have known for many years.  I would consider her and her husband friends.  I have not seen them since I moved to the Philippines, but we keep in touch.  I love them both equally. .I enjoyed their company and I respect them both. 

I was not shocked by her email as she expected me to be, because I saw each of their faults and I always thought they would eventually lead to serious problems.  I admit I thought the problems would have begun sooner than they did.

It is difficult to minister to close friends.  You try to do so without affecting your personal relationship and that is nearly impossible.  If the relationship is extremely important to you then you try to get your point across without really stating your point and that never works and that is exactly what I did. 

I regret it now, but I doubt if either would have appreciated or heeded my advice if I had been upfront back then.  I have thought many times over the years I had been wrong about their relationship because if they had made it this long they would make it to the end. 

She began her email by stating, “You will never believe what happen to us, but after forty years of marriage (X) has ask me for a divorce and has moved out.  Can you believe that?  I am willing to give him the divorce without putting up a fight, but I need to know why and he refuses to tell me.  At first I thought it was another woman or even a man, but I know now that is not the case.  He is in the process of purchasing a small house next door to our oldest daughter and her husband.  I know you must be as shocked as I am, but if you can help me figure this out I would appreciate it.  Love X” 

I replied, “Do you really want to know what I think or do you want me to just try and console you.  The choice is yours.  You know I love you both and it breaks my heart that this has happen, but truthfully I saw it coming many years ago.  Let me know what you want from me.”

She replied she wanted me to tell her what I honestly thought the problem was and not hold back.  She asks did I think he was going through a mid-life crisis.  She has spent a considerable amount of time trying to figure the problem out on her own and by asking others for help and no one has been honest with her.  I assume knowing them like I do they both have prayed about this matter daily. 

How do you tell one of your best friends that you cannot expect more out of a relationship than you put into it, but that is exactly what I had to do?  Of course at first she did not agree with me, but I think over several months she has come to see that much of the problem was her ambition.  To be frank her GREED! 

When I began to deal with her about the problem I ask her to advise me what she felt she had contributed to the relationship and to list at least ten items.  This is her list: 1. I worked at the same place of employment from before we were married until now and as you know I made more money than he did.  2. We were able to take very nice vacations every year from the additional money I brought home.  3.  We were able to send our daughters to the best universities and get them started in life because of my income.  4.  We were able to live in a very nice home in a very nice neighborhood with very nice furnishings due to my income.  5. We each had nice automobiles and were able to provide nice automobiles to the girls when they were living at home.  6. I did not cheat on him and cheating never crossed my mind, although I had many opportunities.  7. I attended football games, basketball games and baseball games with him and you know how I hate sports events.  8.  When he needed clothes I went and picked them out because he did not like to shop and he had bad taste in clothes.  9. I was a good wife and mother.  10. HE KNEW I loved him.

I ask her if she read what she emailed me.  Five of the ten had to do with the money she provided to the relationship.  There was nothing mentioned about meeting emotional needs. Relationships need more than money.

Number six was something any wife or husband is expected to do.  Number seven she stated she does not like sports and everyone knew that because she told everyone and never let him forget the sacrifices she made to attend the games.  Number eight I do not know if I believed it or not.  I tend to believe she did not let him shop for his own clothes because she is particular about her appearance and wanted him to look his best when with her.  I needed her to define number nine to me as to what she thought made a good mother and wife.  How did he know she loved him?  I never saw the two of them holding hands, I never heard an argument, but I never heard verbal expression of love or saw physical signs of love between the two of them.  I heard her say many times when people took offense to what she said to him,  “He knows I love him and only say things that are good for him,”

Before you say it is obvious that they would have problems think about your own relationships at home, work, school and church. Do you take them for granted.  Do you expect more than you give or do you take more than you give?

I have known many people who go to work daily and expect 100% of their pay and give their employer about 50% of their time.  Ask yourself does my employer pay me to carry on personal telephone conversations, look up personal items of interest on the Internet, go back and forth to the coffee maker and eat Bon-Bon’s throughout the day, pay my personal bills at work, listen to my co-workers problems or tell my co-worker my problems on my employers time.  I doubt they do, but a lot of people do it. We are not willing to give what we are even paid to give. 

My dad told me if you take pay for time you were not productive from your employer you rob them of what they are rightfully due.  If you think they do not pay you enough do not try to justify being a thief get another job. 

I am disgusted with men and women, especially men, who have affairs on the side.  I am even more disgusted when society approves of a man having more than one family, while living with his wife and legal family.  Men and women who have these affairs obviously expect more than they give and society by their silence gives a sign of approval. 

It is appalling to me that some people are given the best pews in the church when everyone knows they have a wife and two or three mistresses with children.  It does not make it right just because the man supports the wife and mistresses and all his children.  It is immoral and it certainly is not what God meant for married couples to do when they took their wedding vows and it certainly is not appropriate for a Catholic to do or for a Catholic society to accept as the norm. 

Now to address what my friend said about her never cheating on her husband as if that made her a GOOD wife and mother.  I am sure that is a contributing factor to being a good spouse, but I believe that is what God expects of any spouse and what society should expect of married couples.  When I questioned her about his fidelity she said she honestly believed he never considered being unfaithful to their wedding vows.  So by her standards he was a good husband.

What does the fact that she maintained the same employment for forty plus years and made more money than him have to do with being a good wife and mother?  The fact that she made more than him and she made sure everyone knew it probably contributed to the marriage ending. 

The man before he retired was a chemical engineer making a six figure income.  Did she work so they could have more or so she could have more?  Did she ever consider that her husband and daughters may have needed her time more than her money?  Which did she love more her job, money, title or family?  People can easily be blinded by greed and ambition and not even notice that their spouse has become mother and father to their children.  

She thought having to be out at night four or five times a week dining at expensive restaurants with clients was a big sacrifice for her.  I will admit that the money they made together did make it possible for them to have a housekeeper/cook and that is something few have in the United States.  He had meals prepared every day, but ate alone four or five times a week after the daughters left home.  It seems to me that he made the sacrifices not her.

How do people know you love them if you do not express it with words and deeds?  My dad was a good provider, but a failure in expressing his love to my mother and his children.  It was only two years before he died that he began to realize the importance of expressing his love.  I am thankful for the two years, but honestly to this day I still feel it was given too late in his life. I feel cheated!

I do not believe anyone should remain in a relationship where they have to assume they are loved.  I can recall my mother saying many time, “Your daddy loves you he just does not know how to show it.”  She did not understand that was his problem not ours.  Her remaining silent in order to keep a false sense of peace in the family did not contribute to solving the problem it only made the problem worse and last longer.

Everyone has a responsibility to feed what is feeding them.  I am not talking only about physically feeding; I am also talking about emotionally feeding. 

I have been given many rewards during my life for achievements, etc. but the biggest reward I have ever been given was to be able to take care of my mother the last 18 years of her life. I was able to show her that I appreciated her feeding me, washing me, dressing me, teaching me, protecting me and cleaning up my pee and the other when I could not do those things for myself.  I was not always able to do those things for her personally, but I could see that they were done when I could not.  I can tell you with all sincerity nothing I have done in my life has made me happier than knowing I cared for my mother until the end.  I believe God has blessed me for that more than anything else I have ever accomplished.

A black man at a carwash once told me, “Father you will always be blessed for the way you take care of Ms Reiddie.”  He was a very wise man.

Over the years I have watched people attend church Sunday after Sunday and be fed and never consider feeding the church that fed them spiritually and emotionally.  They never felt they had any responsibility to feed the church.  It is not just a responsibility it is an obligation that God gave us. 

If the man or woman of God is willing to work hard preparing a sermon to feed you every Sunday you owe it to God to feed the him or her and the church.

Do you go to the movie, walk in and out and not pay.  No you do not.  You expect to pay so the theater can continue to operate.  Then please tell me why you have different expectations for the church.  I guess it is because you know you would be arrested for not paying for services rendered anywhere except at the church.  Everything in life revolves around being responsible and at least giving as much as you receive.

Giving and receiving is a cycle that God established when He created the earth.  A farmer does not expect food from the ground, unless he or she plants seeds.  You do not expect a plant in your home to grow unless you feed it water and sunlight.  You do not expect a baby to be born healthy unless you feed it properly in the womb.  You do not expect your vehicle to run unless you feed it fuel.  Then why do you expect love to grow when you do not give love, respect to grow when you do not give respect, loyalty to grow when you do not give loyalty, protection to grow when you do not give protection, friendship to grow when you do not give friendship, etc.

You should have high expectation from all your relationships because you should be willing to give more than is expected to maintain and grow those relationships.

In closing, I want to say something that has bothered me for some time.  I wish people would stop complaining about the relationship they have with their children and the younger generation.  We are as guilty as they are if they are not responsible.  Have you ever stopped to think if we have given them the time we should have.  Have we been excellent role models of how to foster good relationships?

If we give more than we expect we usually get more than we expect and if we do not maybe we should consider getting out of the relationship as my friend did.

What makes you happy?

Do you even know what would make you happy? A lot of people believe if only I had this or that I would be happy or happier. I can guarantee you getting the right stuff will not make you happy or happier. Just look at the movie stars who are extremely wealthy.  Daily we read of their unhappiness, drug abuse, relationship failures and bad choices.  Then look at people in Third World countries that have little to nothing and they are smiling and happy. The people in the Philippines are a good example that you can be poor and be happy.  

The people around you have more to do with your happiness than money or material goods. If you want to experience unhappiness and depression surround yourself with unhappy and negative people. You will soon become unhappy, negative and discontent.

I have been at the bedside of many people who were dying. I have never heard one person ask a family member or friend to bring their expensive automobile to the parking lot so they could gaze upon it from the hospital window. I have often heard them request friends or family members to contact a loved one so they could spend a few last moments with them.

Have you noticed that happy people are most likely people who are at peace with God? I believe anything that undermines your peace with God will eventually make you unhappy. Peace with God allows you to be at peace with yourself and others. Jesus said the greatest command is love God, self and one another. Love gives you the capacity to be peaceful and extend peace to others. People love peaceful people and avoid trouble makers. It may be hard to believe, but if you are at peace with God and self you can remain at peace when you are being persecuted.

Some people have come to believe that you cannot be happy and serve God. I can assure you serving God will not stand in the way of anyone being happy. God created us to be happy. God is the way to happiness. Sinful pleasure separates us from God and others and will eventually bring unhappiness to us and others. Sinful pleasures may bring temporary happiness, but not lasting happiness.

People who depend on God are happy. People who believe God is in control of all their circumstances are happy. If you think you control the outcome of your life then you are sadly mistaken. My father thought he was financially secure and if something happen to him he had prepared for us to be financially secure. In 1957 his health began to deteriorate rapidly. The last days of his life cost us nearly $300,000 now keep in mind it was 1957 and 1958 not 2015. They did an experimental heart surgery replacing a valve in his heart with the valve of a pig. His last eleven days were spent begging my mother to let him die before she used up all the saving trying to keep him alive.

Some people allow the fear of dying to rob them of an opportunity to live. We must accept death as a part of life just as we accept birth as a part of life. There is no reason for those who believe in Jesus Christ to fear death. I am in the final stages of heart failure. I do not know how much longer I have, but I am determined the fear of death is not going to rob me of living what time I have left to the fullest. I no longer pray for healing, but I do pray for comfort in order to continue to serve God and others.

Meekness is your having the correct evaluation of you. Unfortunately today many have come to view meekness as weakness. Meek people can deal with the realities of life. They accept the valuation that God has of them. They strive to accomplish what God called them to do and do not strive to do more than they have the ability to do. Meek people are happy people.

Happy people do the right thing even when no one is looking. They do the right thing even if it cost them. Eventually doing the wrong things in life will catch up with you and you will regret them. Happiness follows moral decisions and unhappiness follows immoral decisions – always.

Generous people are happy people. God created us to serve and to give. Joy comes from helping others.  Our financial model should be to give, save and then spend the rest.

We reap what we sow. Farmers plant seeds, but they do not become plants the next morning, it takes time. Happiness takes time and it is a process. Foolishly some people plant bad seeds and because nothing happens immediately they think they have gotten away with their immorality.

There is a relationship between money and happiness, but the relationship is not how much money you have. The relationship between money and happiness is what you do with your money. The relationship you have with your money is what is important. Money in itself is not evil, but what you do with your money can be evil.

In today’s society our chief competition with our love of God is our love of money. It is impossible for both to be our master or to be number one in our lives. Our human nature leads us to want what we do not have. Greed is the result of mismanaging our money and trying to keep it all for ourselves. Greed can also be the results of fearing we will lose our money or need it at a later date and this leads us not to be charitable. This fear demonstrates a lack of faith in God to provide.

Debt makes us a slave to money. The more debt we have the more money we need to pay the debt and take care of our daily needs at the same time. Debt can easily rob you of your peace and happiness. We have all purchased things that we did not really need and later regretted it. Debt is the number one cause of divorces and relationships ending. I do not suggest that anyone get rid of all their credit cards, but I strongly suggest you manage your use of them wisely. For the past ten years I have not had one single credit card or bought one item on credit. I have chosen to wait until I had the money to pay for the purchase in cash and I assure you I am much happier. I also have more because I do not have interest payments.

You have more control of your happiness than anyone else. You can choose to be around positive people, you can choose to use your money wisely, you can choose to put God first in your life, you can choose to always do the right thing, and you can choose to be a reconciler and peacemaker.

Being unhappy can lead us to making bad choices because we are looking for a quick fix. Do not make major decisions when you are unhappy. There are no quick fixes in life.  Immoral pleasure is more tempting when we are unhappy so always prioritize your happiness over pleasure.

As long as you are always about you then you are not going to be happy. You are not enough to make yourself happy. We need God and others in our lives. We need good relationships. We need to share what we have with others. We need to be available to serve God and others.

I have heard it said a thousand times, “I do not have time to volunteer or serve.” I am telling you today you need to make time for serving others. Service will bring you true peace, joy and happiness.  God created us to give, serve and mentor. Selfishness may come natural, but that was not part of God’s plan for our lives.  Giving and serving are important life lessons to teach our children.

Jesus Christ gave his life for you! What have you freely givne to others? Learn to make sacrifices of your time and finances and happiness will follow!