Don't Poison a Child's Mind.

I was bless with an experience I will never forget when passing through Immigrations in Singapore.  We were in line and in front of me was a Filipino mother and two children.  One child a boy about 10 and a girl about 3. In the next line was an Indian mother with two young boys maybe 5 and 8. 

These children started reacting with each other in spite of language and cultural difference with pure love - no bigotry, no bias, just pure love and delight. It was a reminder to me bigotry is a learned habit or character trait. It is not a God given characteristic. Matthew 21:16 - "...out of mouths of babes and sucklings God prepared praise ..."  NOT HATE!  Oh, if we adults could only learn from the  young children the world would be a better place indeed!

"Hatreds never cease by hatreds in this world.  By love alone they cease.  This is an ancient Law."  

I have shared many thoughts over the year's concerning our thinking for ourselves and not depending upon others to think for us or teach us absolute truths about God, self, world or the universe.

It is delusion for us to allow others to teach us to cherish pride and selfishness when we all know in the end it leads to suffering, loneliness and death.

God did not put upon the heart of every person the right way to live with self and others simply for us to think about them. God put them there for us to practice and to make them part of our daily lives. 

We should control our own minds and keep them clean of evil thoughts concerning greed, jealousy, prejudices and hate.  Love, respect, humility and faithfulness to God (not denomination, nationalities, preachers, priest, bishops, traditions, anger, religions,etc) is the only way to a happy life.  

The youngest Indian child at the airport had a bottle of water and without words he walked over to the youngest Filipino child and sat it down in front of her and backed away.  I knew instantly he was sharing all he had to offer the other child love (water).  Tears filled my eyes and I knew I had witness pure love. 

Our minds, our learned behaviors, can make us like God or like the devil.  We should control our minds and not allow others to leads us away from the right path.  RESPECT each other. Human's have more in common than we have differences.  God created us to be like milk and water to mingle together not like oil and water that repel each other.  

I honestly believe if you do not feel this way you have never had a personal relationship with God.  You certainly are NOT a follower of Christ.  

Life is becoming more clear to me as I grow old and my body falls apart like an old worn out car that has traveled many, many happy miles.  Do not make the same mistakes I did if you are still young in body.  You cannot cram five lifetimes into one there is only so much time.  

You do not need to see or do everything to have a full life. You only need to recognize the importance of love and service to each person you meet.  

God did not ask us to solve all of the world's problems just do the best we can with those we encounter. 

There are always people around you that need an encouraging word, a person willing to listen and or a helpful hand.  It is not all about having large sums of money to give away.  A little becomes a lot when good people come together for one cause. 

Few if any of us would sleep with a poisonous snake in our bed so why go to bed with a poisonous snake (our mind)?  Ephesians 4:26 "...do not go to bed while you are still angry..." Go to bed filled with hate, anger, bitterness, jealousy, prejudices and discontent and  you will awake the next morning with the same bed partner not beside you, but inside you.  You should control your own mind.  Protect your mind from poisonous thoughts of others. 

We should practice being like the children I witness in the Singapore Immigration line.  

Expat in the Philippines - that loves it but does not understand it all

I do not understand, but I am only a guest in the Philippines – so who cares?

I moved to the Philippines over a decade ago. My reason for moving here was to do mission work. I was told EVERYONE spoke fluent conversational English. I also had responsible, loyal, dependable Filipino neighbors in the states. It sounded like a perfect place to work and retire in.

I think I have adjusted to the new culture, new traditions, third world living pretty well, but I cannot get use to the litter. There is a large vacant property across from my house that is owned by a Filipino doctor now living in California. My NEIGHBORS use his lot to dumb their garbage night after night. Not only is it unsightly it breeds RATS!

These neighbors are church going, family orientated people, own homes, children go to college, and some even own businesses. In fact one owns a large agricultural fertilizer business and he used to park his large trucks on the property at night for free without seeking permission. These people are not squatters.

The owner of the property on his visit in 2015 had a four foot block wall fence with four feet of wire on top installed trying to stop the problem. The neighbors just throw the garbage bags over his fence as if it was not there. One neighbor even commented, “I am glad he put up the fence the garbage does not blow in my yard now (and laughed).” It did stop the people from using his property for a parking lot. They now park on the NARROW streets in front of everyone else’s house blocking their gates when they actually have one car space at each house. You cannot address a problem with people that do not even realize it is a problem.

I do not sit on my front balcony any longer because I have to look at Davao’s version of “Smokey Mountain” (without the smoke) in Manila.

Filipinos are known to be disciplined abroad. Most OFWs tend to finish everything at work before the day ends; they are seen as courteous, refined, and well-mannered; and they carefully follow the rules of the company or community where they work and live. This observation is based on my personal experiences.

I do not understand why so many Filipinos lack discipline when in their own country.

Could it be that they demonstrated and won their freedom from martial law and now they take that freedom for granted and abuse it? It is as if they have forgotten others have rights to. The family next door live in a nice townhouse with two full bathrooms (CR’s). The men walk past the downstairs bathroom to go across the street and urinate on the neighbors fence – why? Do they understand that they are vandalizing PRIVATE property or do they just not care about others property? Democracy has limits! We now play a game when going from my home to downtown the one that catches the most men urinating on walls win a free coke when we arrive.

I have noticed since living in the Philippines a lot of Filipino children are growing up with less regard for rules and regulations. Is this because they are getting to be more Westernized? If it is I would not blame it on Western Nations I would blame it on Filipino parents for allowing it to happen.  ‘Po’ and ‘Opo’ were trademark words of Filipinos when it came to showing respect to people older than them. These are the words I seldom hear these days from the younger generation.

 This morning a six year old a few doors from me cried and screamed for over 1 and ½ hours. He beat on the fence gate with a hammer. Eventually the father started yelling at him and then the mother started yelling. Later in the day I ask the aunt what was the problem with the child – he wanted an ice cream from the Nestle peddler. His tantrums happen frequently.  When the tantrum is over the family members think it is funny – they call him “little macho man”. Does anyone think that this little monster will grow up to respect the rights of others – I do not think so. In the States I would have walked down to see if the kid was okay, but it is just a normal occurrence here.

Do some Filipinos not take discipline seriously because they do not see how serious it is? How would they when even their government officials do not follow the rules they have enacted? Under the table transactions; vote buying; VIP treatments in public activities and processes are just among some of the rampant forms of corruption in the government that remove the power of discipline in the society.

Some law enforcers are not being good role models either: Traffic enforcers getting bribed to let violators go and police officers are involved in crimes like kidnapping and drug trafficking. People do not see the need of following rules or even taking the initiative to take steps to improve things, because they know nothing would happen when the movement does not come from the top.

My neighbor was stopped when we were on our way to Mass. He was speeding and ran a traffic light. He bribed the law enforcer to let him go. He laughed and said, “I am glad I did not get stopped by the ONE honest law enforcer in the Philippines.”  I ask him did he realize his 15 and 13 year old boys were in the car and witness what he did. He said, “Father, they have to learn how to survive in the Philippines.”

No matter how good the regulations are if they are not implemented by the powers to be then what good are they? As long as the citizens do not see any danger of not following the laws, they will not obey them. I pray newly elected Duterte will address that issue.  From what I hear in the media he is a tough law enforcer, but we still have rape, drugs, murders, thief’s in Davao. Maybe not as bad as Manila or other places but we still have too much crime. 

I do not know why, but it seems many Filipinos are impatient or believe themselves to be privileged people. I think this is why shortcuts are popular here. Some people, who do not like getting into long lines when paying bills cut in line or go to the front of the line or even use their connections to avoid the line. This is common in the banks or waiting on a taxi. I use to say something until my Filipino friends kept getting on me because I was making the rude person ‘lose face’ – who should care if they ‘lose face’.  They need to ‘lose face’. But, I stopped saying anything because I always looked like the bad guy - the arrogant, ignorant, pushy person who was taking advantage of everyone else seem to be the victim to Filipinos.

Lack of respect indeed seems a problem that some people in the Philippines seem not to mind, although it poses a serious dilemma on peoples values and character. People should consider when we tolerate this disrespectful behavior, it can eventually lead to crime and violence. Clearly, society worldwide today lacks the clear perception about respect.

President Marcos had a lot of faults, but people were disciplined in his time. The economy was healthier than most in Asia. I hope someday politicians and citizens embrace the good of Marcos and avoid the bad. Learn from history do not ignore it and stop making the same mistakes over and over again.

P.S. – I know many Filipinos do not like foreigners making any comments about their country or their people – they are usually the same ones that bash the United States on a regular basis.  I like living in the Philippines better than in the U.S. or I would go home – that is common sense. I regularly point out problems with the U.S. on my blog – I just do not think it does anyone any good to bury our heads in the sand and pretend to the world we do not have problems.

Corruption in the Catholic Church

The official audit is out and it “ain’t” much better!

The annual audit of reports for sexual abuse by members of the U.S. Roman Catholic clergy was released last Friday and it showed a sharp INCREASE in the number of new claims.

The audit showed that 828 people came forward from July 1, 2014 through June 20, 2015 to say they had been sexually abused by priests, deacons and members of religious groups (yes, that includes cardinals and bishops). I will always believe the cover up was not to protect the Church, but to protect guilty cardinals and bishops.

Six dioceses in the U.S. have filed for bankruptcy because of the sex abuse scandal. Money that could have been used for the poor was paid out to cover the sins of evil priest. I am amazed how the bishops in the Philippines can be so critical of corrupt politicians stealing money from the poor when they are as guilty. As far as I am concerned the funds bishops used to protect evil priest was stealing from the poor.

It is true that the bulk of the cases are old cases changes in the legal system made it possible for old victims to file claims. Catholic parishes and other orders spent $153.6 million on settlements, legal fees and other expenses related to claims of sexual assault over the last one year period.  The Church spent $119.1 million the previous year. The church has paid out BILLIONS of dollars since 2002 because of the sex abuse scandal.

This is what happens when men are looking for a POSITION/TITLE and not a MISSION. Too many priest, bishops, cardinals are not looking for a mission they are looking for the respect a position/title brings. They do not have the character to earn the respect they want. They need the clerical clothes to demand the respect they want. Many young men had a mission when they started, but were corrupted when surrounded by older priest that had lost site of their mission. Their immaturity led them to mismanage their opportunity and away from their mission. Position means nothing if you do not understand your mission. The same is true of politicians.

God did not give us money, talents, blessing, opportunities, etc., in order for us to be important. God gave them to us to accomplish His mission on earth. The position/respect will come if you never lose sight of the mission. Unfortunately too many in the Church want the position, but not the mission.

Celebrating Mass does not take the place of a personal relationship with God. Celebrating Mass does not replace personal time with God in prayer, study and meditation. You do not know it all simply because you finished the obstacle course in the seminary. Knowledge comes with experience and experience comes with living it.

Success is hard to manage and if you cannot manage it you will eventually lose it. You are not fit to be blessed if you cannot manage it. Good managers are successful in good or bad times – they know how to survive. They survive because they know how to treat people. You cannot abuse people and survive!

Anger can be a motivator

I heard a minister preaching on the sin of anger. He said anger has no positive benefits and can only bring harm and often destruction to the person that is angry. He added that often the person you are angry with does not care that you are angry and may not even know that you are angry or what you are angry about. It brought to mind my own personal experience with anger. I agree when you keep your anger suppressed inside you the person you are angry with may not know you are angry, they may not care and may not realize they have done something to offend you, but I disagree that anger cannot be a motivator and have positive effects.

My father died when I was in my early teens. His oldest brother was a real jerk. After my father’s funeral he was standing on our back porch talking with some relatives and said, “I do not know what will happen to that boy. He has never had to work a day in his life, but I sure the hell am not going to help them.” He did not know that I was listening to him from inside the door.

My mother was in her bedroom with her sister crying. I went in and ask her to promise me one thing. She said I cannot promise you anything unless you tell me what it is. I told her promise me you will never ask anyone for any help. She asks why I would make such a request and I ask her to just promise me and she did.

My anger towards my uncle motivated me to succeed and with the help of God I accomplish all my goals in life and more. He never knew I was angry, but that did not matter to me. I was determined to have more money and be more successful than he ever was and I succeeded.

No one knew how I felt about him or what he had said until he died. My grandmother informed me he had died and wanted to know when I would be arriving for the funeral. I informed her I would not be coming to the funeral which shocked her. She asks why and I told her. I then called my mother and told her if our family send flowers for her not to put my name on them and she ask why and I told her.

Following my father’s death I went to work after school and on weekends. I finished high school, got a Master’s Degree in Theology with minors in psychology, government, philosophy and history. It took me eight years to complete college because I had to work and attend classes. We never ask or received any help from anyone, except God.

During my lifetime I have pastored a church, owned a grocery store, electronics store, café, janitorial service and still own stock in an automotive repair shop.  I never experienced a failure in my life. The secret to my success was the motivation I receive from the anger I had for my uncle. I give the Holy Spirit credit for giving me the knowledge to turn my anger into positive energy because I was young and would not have known it on my own.

Anger can create the most powerful energy that a human can have and if channeled in the right direction can work miracles.  Anger is not bad or good, what you do with anger will determine if it results will be bad or good.

Anger is like fire it can be helpful or harmful. You can use fire to destroy or you can use it to benefit you. It is what you do with the energy from the fire that determines if it is good or bad. The same is true with anger you can use the energy from anger to harm or to benefit. Energy cannot be destroyed, but it can be transformed for good or evil.  You determine how you will use the energy from anger.

You may keep your anger inside and think you have it under control, but the energy from anger is still there. It is inside eating away at you. High blood pressure, ulcers, colitis, and other digestive diseases are common in people who keep their anger inside of themselves. Or, you can put the energy from anger to work and produce a positive outcome.

I did not tell anyone that I was angry, but I did not keep it stifled inside, I put the energy from my anger to work for my good. You can share your anger with everyone you come in contact with and explain how you were wronged and each time you tell the story you add gasoline to the flames of your anger. You use your anger to produce more anger. It is nothing wrong with seeking help from someone that can help, but it is a waste of time just to rehash the same story over and over. I would have gone to someone that I knew could help, but I did not have a person like that in my life at the time. Nothing positive comes from using the energy from your anger to complain.

 I chose to use the energy of my anger to motivate me into creating a better situation. I discovered later that this is the highest purpose for the energy that comes from anger and is probably why God gave us the emotion of anger. It is the greatest motivator you can have. The energy from anger can give you the opportunity to create something better out of the situation that created the anger.

I was determined to set boundaries and earn the respect that I thought I deserved. I knew I was not worthless as my uncle thought. It is interesting that he lived in Florida and we lived in Texas and I had not even seen the man for a total of ten days in my life. My father avoided him because as I said earlier he was a jerk. I am sure he would roll over in his grave if he knew he was responsible for much of my success and had motivated me to be the most successful person in our family.

Do not be ashamed of your anger. Transform your anger energy into motivation so that you might discover ways to change the situation into one in which will benefit all those around you. The results from the energy from my anger has allowed me to provide good incomes for over one hundred families, support my mother, until her death, pay college tuition for deserving people, pay hospital bills for people that needed some assistant, do all kinds of charity work and brought me tremendous joy in the process. Don’t waste anger put it to good use!