Anger can be a motivator

I heard a minister preaching on the sin of anger. He said anger has no positive benefits and can only bring harm and often destruction to the person that is angry. He added that often the person you are angry with does not care that you are angry and may not even know that you are angry or what you are angry about. It brought to mind my own personal experience with anger. I agree when you keep your anger suppressed inside you the person you are angry with may not know you are angry, they may not care and may not realize they have done something to offend you, but I disagree that anger cannot be a motivator and have positive effects.

My father died when I was in my early teens. His oldest brother was a real jerk. After my father’s funeral he was standing on our back porch talking with some relatives and said, “I do not know what will happen to that boy. He has never had to work a day in his life, but I sure the hell am not going to help them.” He did not know that I was listening to him from inside the door.

My mother was in her bedroom with her sister crying. I went in and ask her to promise me one thing. She said I cannot promise you anything unless you tell me what it is. I told her promise me you will never ask anyone for any help. She asks why I would make such a request and I ask her to just promise me and she did.

My anger towards my uncle motivated me to succeed and with the help of God I accomplish all my goals in life and more. He never knew I was angry, but that did not matter to me. I was determined to have more money and be more successful than he ever was and I succeeded.

No one knew how I felt about him or what he had said until he died. My grandmother informed me he had died and wanted to know when I would be arriving for the funeral. I informed her I would not be coming to the funeral which shocked her. She asks why and I told her. I then called my mother and told her if our family send flowers for her not to put my name on them and she ask why and I told her.

Following my father’s death I went to work after school and on weekends. I finished high school, got a Master’s Degree in Theology with minors in psychology, government, philosophy and history. It took me eight years to complete college because I had to work and attend classes. We never ask or received any help from anyone, except God.

During my lifetime I have pastored a church, owned a grocery store, electronics store, café, janitorial service and still own stock in an automotive repair shop.  I never experienced a failure in my life. The secret to my success was the motivation I receive from the anger I had for my uncle. I give the Holy Spirit credit for giving me the knowledge to turn my anger into positive energy because I was young and would not have known it on my own.

Anger can create the most powerful energy that a human can have and if channeled in the right direction can work miracles.  Anger is not bad or good, what you do with anger will determine if it results will be bad or good.

Anger is like fire it can be helpful or harmful. You can use fire to destroy or you can use it to benefit you. It is what you do with the energy from the fire that determines if it is good or bad. The same is true with anger you can use the energy from anger to harm or to benefit. Energy cannot be destroyed, but it can be transformed for good or evil.  You determine how you will use the energy from anger.

You may keep your anger inside and think you have it under control, but the energy from anger is still there. It is inside eating away at you. High blood pressure, ulcers, colitis, and other digestive diseases are common in people who keep their anger inside of themselves. Or, you can put the energy from anger to work and produce a positive outcome.

I did not tell anyone that I was angry, but I did not keep it stifled inside, I put the energy from my anger to work for my good. You can share your anger with everyone you come in contact with and explain how you were wronged and each time you tell the story you add gasoline to the flames of your anger. You use your anger to produce more anger. It is nothing wrong with seeking help from someone that can help, but it is a waste of time just to rehash the same story over and over. I would have gone to someone that I knew could help, but I did not have a person like that in my life at the time. Nothing positive comes from using the energy from your anger to complain.

 I chose to use the energy of my anger to motivate me into creating a better situation. I discovered later that this is the highest purpose for the energy that comes from anger and is probably why God gave us the emotion of anger. It is the greatest motivator you can have. The energy from anger can give you the opportunity to create something better out of the situation that created the anger.

I was determined to set boundaries and earn the respect that I thought I deserved. I knew I was not worthless as my uncle thought. It is interesting that he lived in Florida and we lived in Texas and I had not even seen the man for a total of ten days in my life. My father avoided him because as I said earlier he was a jerk. I am sure he would roll over in his grave if he knew he was responsible for much of my success and had motivated me to be the most successful person in our family.

Do not be ashamed of your anger. Transform your anger energy into motivation so that you might discover ways to change the situation into one in which will benefit all those around you. The results from the energy from my anger has allowed me to provide good incomes for over one hundred families, support my mother, until her death, pay college tuition for deserving people, pay hospital bills for people that needed some assistant, do all kinds of charity work and brought me tremendous joy in the process. Don’t waste anger put it to good use! 

Don't waste a tragedy - use it to help others!

In the mid-80’s I had my first heart attack.  I was not sick and I certainly was not aware that anything was wrong with my heart.  It was a beautiful morning and I decided to go on a bike ride with my nephew who was about ten at the time.  When we got a few blocks from our home I noticed that I was un-usually tired.

I kept pushing myself because my nephew was excited about going on a ride with his Uncle Tommy.  I told him as we approached a bridge that when we got to the other side to take the side road and stop.  As we reached the spot where I had instructed him to stop I fell from the bike and I knew I was going to pass out.  I felt NO pain!  I told him to go to a payphone and call Jesus Martinez an employee to come immediately.  When I came to I was at the Methodist’s Hospital in Houston, Texas being prepped for surgery.

At that time heart surgery was much different than it is today.  The time in I.C.U. and in a hospital room before being released was much longer.  It took months to recuperate and return to work.

I recuperated at a small farm I had in Highland, Texas.  One Sunday morning before church I got up before the others and walked down to the pond to pray and read my Bible.  When I began to return to the house I noticed this large pile of logs that had been cut about two years earlier and had never been burned because it was so large I was afraid the fire might not be manageable.  Then the switch went off in my brain that today was the time to burn that eyesore.

I went to the barn to get a five gallon can of diesel fuel and discovered there was none, but there was a five gallon can of gasoline.  I took the gasoline climbed up on the pile and poured it out over the logs.  I went to the house and got a newspaper and made it into the shape of a basketball. I intended to throw it upon the fire from a distance. 

As I struck the match to light the newspaper there was instantly a rush of fire from the pile of logs to me.  My clothes were made of nylon and they melted to my body. All my hair was burned off.  I first began to run and then I fell to the ground and rolled to put the fire out. 

I went to the house and got in the shower and called to a family member to come to my room where I was showering in cold water.  I told him what had happened and that I needed to go to the hospital.  He opened the shower door and yelled, “My God, I have to get an ambulance.”  I told him I did not want to wake anyone else up and just drive me to the hospital. 

At the time I guess I was in shock and did not realize how bad it was.  On the way to the hospital the pain began and it was like no pain I had ever experienced. 

Infection is the enemy of a burn and there is a process called debriding of the skin that must be done.  The process requires that the skin be scrubbed to get rid of the dead skin and needless to say it is painful.  There are exercises that must be done to stretch the skin so you can eventually move as normal as possible.

The doctors advised me that I would most likely have scars and it was possible that plastic surgery could not repair all the damage.  There were no mirrors in the room because they do not want you to see the damage until they think you are mentally prepared to deal with it..

As a young minister I was assigned to the call on patients at the burn center and I often said, “I know it hurts” or even more stupid, “I know how you feel.”  I realized when I actually experienced the same thing how foolish those words were.  I had no idea at the time I spoke them what they were going through or how much pain they were in.

Many times I said, “Why me God!”  I could not imagine anything good coming out of this experience.  I certainly did not see how it benefited God in anyway.  It would be months before I could return to my ministry.

Years later I got a call late one Saturday night from a man in our church.  He said, “Father I do not think we have enough wine for services in the morning.  I got up and dressed and went to a twenty-four hour Wal-Mart.  As I stood in line to check out I noticed a young boy bandaged as I had been sitting with his mother.  When I checked out I went to him and began talking to him and his mother said, “Father, he will not talk to you.  He has not spoken to anyone in three months.” 

I continued to talk to the boy and I told him I really did know what he was going through because I had been through the same.  After a while he said, “If you were burned where are the scars?”

I told him the doctors had told me I would be scared, but I prayed and I did everything the doctors told me to regardless of how painful it was. 

My recovery was so remarkable they video the process and the video was used in teachings medical students and doctors on treating burn patients.  

I continued to visit the boy at the Shriner’s Burn Center in Galveston, Texas until he returned to Argentina.  Unfortunately he did have some scaring, but when he left he was optimistic and anxious to see his friends and family back home.

All those years I wondered “why” and then I realized God had given me an opportunity to minister to and help a young boy that was going through the same tragedy I experienced.  No one can comfort someone like a person that has experienced the same pain they are going through. Christ needed to experience the same suffering and pain humans do to understand what we go thorough and to be truly human.

One other miracle in the story is that when burned people normal take a deep breath and it damages the lungs.  As a matter of fact the doctors said they had never seen anyone burned as I was that did not have lung damage.  The only explanation they could give was I mush not have gasp because I had no lung damage.

Please, don’t waste a tragedy.  Learn from it and find a way to use it to benefit others. I do not always understand why bad things happen, but I am convinced God can use any tragedy for His good and for the good of others.