The Bible states - God will not put more on you than you can stand - NOT TRUE!

The Bible states, “God will not put more on you than you can stand” – NOT TRUE!

If you believe me wrong read 1 Corinthians 10:6-13 and Matthew 11:28-30 again it does not say what you may have thought it said or some sentimental Christian or religious leader told you it said.

People are surprised to find that at no time in the movie Casablanca does Rick ever say, “Play it again, Sam.”  It is also surprising to know that in over 79 Star Trek episodes and 6 movies, no one ever actually says, “Beam me up, Scotty.” But people all assume that those clichés and many others are from the films and movies they attribute them, too.

It works the same with the Bible.  There are all kinds of things that people assume the Bible says but it actually doesn’t.  At the top of that list is “The Lord helps those who help themselves” with something like 80% of Christians believing that quote is from the Bible. It’s actually from the Ancient Greeks by way of Benjamin Franklin’s Poor Richard’s Almanac.

But in a close second is the statement: “God never gives you more than you can bear.”  It is frequently “quoted” to people in times of distress with great certainty.  Everything will be alright—the suffering one is told—God wouldn’t have given you this trial if you couldn’t get through it. It is quite comforting to those suffering until they find out it is not true and then they begin to doubt God because of you ‘YOUR’ biblical untruth.

There is a quote like it; but there is nothing that says “God will never give you more than you can bear.”  The quote that is frequently used to back up the idea, from 1 Corinthians, doesn’t really say what people think it does. It actually says, “No temptation has seized you that isn’t common for people … God is faithful. He won’t allow you to be tempted beyond your abilities ...”

Paul is reminding his readers that God will not allow people to be tempted beyond their abilities.  That is, there is no temptation that you should feel you are powerless against, because God would not allow you to be tempted by something you couldn’t resist. If you’re being tempted, in Paul’s thinking, it’s something you are strong enough to resist. That is a far different thing from claiming that nothing bad will happen to you or that you will not have to bear a burden that you cannot bear alone, without God.

Paul even states they suffered burdens they could not bear in their own strength, “We were weighed down with a load of suffering that was so far beyond our strength that we were afraid we might not survive.” (2 Corinthians 1:8). We are also told in Psalm 38:8, “I’m worn out, completely crushed; I groan because of my miserable heart” and in Psalm 38:4, “My wrongdoings are stacked higher than my head; they are a weight that’s way too heavy for me.” Elijah was told by an angel:  “Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.” (1 Kings 19:7). Let us not forget Jesus, too, who died in agony on the cross, cried out “My God, My God, why have you left me?”

Not only is it not found in scripture our life experiences do not bear it out. There are all kinds of things that happen that we cannot bear. Sometimes our lives come crashing down around us.

Trite platitudes that are designed to make people feel better are harmful to Christianity. Can you imagine someone saying to an inmate at Auschwitz don’t worry - God never gives you more than you can bear or saying it to a woman whose children are killed by a long buried landmine while they were playing or a refugee who survived the massacre of her entire village or someone who has just been given a diagnosis of a terminal illness?

I am thankful that we Catholic’s have the crucifix and not just a cross for it reminds  us that our faith is driven by the hope and the promise of the Resurrection, but that we still live very much in a world defined by the Crucifixion – pain and suffering.

When you tell suffering people that God never gives them more than they can bear and they are being crushed at the time by problems you are causing them to question what is wrong with them?  What are they doing wrong?  Why isn’t God helping them? You are not bringing them to God you are pushing them away from God. If you do not have more comforting words than that to give them then keep your mouth shut and listen.

If you truly believe no problem comes your way that you cannot bear then you are making it about you and not God. Why do you need God if you alone can bear all your problems? Christ said, “Come to me, all you who are struggling hard and carrying heavy loads and I will give you rest. Put on my yoke, and learn from me. I’m gentle and humble. And you will find rest for yourselves. My yoke is easy to bear, and my burden is light.” Christ did not tell us to go it alone. Our faith is demonstrated by our recognition that we cannot bear the burdens ourselves and trust in the grace of God who bears them with us.

The church should be a place where you can come and say, “I have a burden that I cannot bear” and instead of being judged for having a weak faith, you are surrounded by a network of love and support that will bear that burden with you.  Just as Christ takes upon himself the burdens we cast upon him, unfortunately to many church going Christians and religious leaders have forgotten that.

The Gospel reminds us that our problems do not disappear because we have become followers of Christ, but we are promised that in those sufferings we are not alone. God does not make us suffer alone He is always with us. God will stand beside us in our times of trouble.

“Come to me, all you who are struggling hard and carrying heavy loads and I will give you rest.”

Do not beat yourself up when you fail and give in to temptations that you told God in prayer that you would not do again.  God is happy for all the days that the temptation came up and you did not give in and does not hold against you the days that you did. God will is patient!  Just pick yourself up and try again.  God is a God of more than one chance.

Looking for signs that God can still use me!

My health has deteriorated drastically over the last two years. My mind wants to do the things I once did, but my body will not allow it. I try to continue to go to church on Sundays because I have a strong desire to do so and go to the mall coffee shop a few times a week to satisfy friends. Each and every time I do I wonder if it is really worth it? Personally, it is too much of a struggle and drains me of every ounce of energy that I have, not to mention the chest pain and shortness of breath.

Lately something small always happens that causes me to make negative comments. Things that once would not have bothered me now drive me nuts. Little things like people eating with their hands in nice restaurants instead of using utensils, unattended children in the coffee shop splashing your coffee as they run and hit your table, people who see you walking to get in a taxi and know you are walking with a cane and assistance from someone else, but will run and get the taxi ahead of you.  I spiral downward and seem to be unable not to make nasty comments.

I then regret going out of the house. I begin to think I gave my life to Christ wanting to be used by Him, but I expected to serve out of my strength and not my weakness. It is hard to serve when you no longer feel adequate to do so.

As usual for this time of year I began to study the Christmas story. It hit me yesterday how Mary must have felt. I did a piece sometime back that I did not understand why people think the birth of Christ was a walk in the park for Mary.

How many friends and neighbors do you think really believed Mary was a virgin?  Her pregnancy must have been a scandal and the focal point of gossipers. Her family must have felt disgraced. Joseph at first did not even believe God had called Mary to give birth to Christ.

I wonder if Mary at times thought I did not sign on for this public humiliation. Did she ever say, ‘you are God why can’t you handle this better?’ Do you think Mary ever ask God will this one day get better? After all Mary was mortal, not a god.

I just do not believe Mary was totally jubilant as she struggled, pregnant, the last eighty miles to Bethlehem. She may have said some unkind words at times. She had no one to make the trip easier except Joseph. I know we vision her riding upon a donkey because that is what we see in pictures, but the Bible says nothing about a donkey. I believe Mary walked the eighty miles. How many pregnant women about to give birth do you know that would or could go on an eighty mile hike?

Why was Joseph’s family not traveling with them? They were required to go to Bethlehem for the census just as Joseph was. Do you think the family may not have wanted to be seen with them because they were ashamed of Mary’s pregnancy? All we really know is there was no prearranged place for them to stay. Joseph must have had family that lived in Bethlehem. No one seems to have felt an obligation to give up their bed for a pregnant woman.   

Did Mary not wonder why God had not intervened to make things easier for her? Scripture does not record that this birth was anything other than ordinary. It appears to me to have been a bloody and painful birth as all births are.  She gave birth and the baby was placed in swaddling cloth as all babies were at the time. It seems to have been a normal human birthing.

It would have been normal for family to have been present for the birth. The Bible records Mary and Joseph were alone. It makes no mention of family. Why did the family choose to stay away? Do you not think this would have made the situation even more difficult for a new mother?

I am not a woman, but I have counsel with lots of pregnant women. I have never met a woman about to give birth or has just given birth that her body chemistry was normal. All sorts of things must have gone through Mary’s mind – is this place safe, is this place clean, where do I lay the baby, God is this what you really planned for us and is this really the Son of God?

Signs in the Bible were significant. Can you imagine how relieved Mary must have been when the shepherds came and told Mary and Joseph all that had happened? Angels had proclaimed their child’s birth. The shepherds were Mary’s confirmation that her baby was the Son of God.

The Shepherd’s needed a sign to let them know they were in the right place. They were told: “…you will find a baby wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger.” The messy, dirty, smelly feeding trough was the sign that God used to show the shepherds where the Savior lay.

Mary needed a sign, the shepherds needed a sign and we sometimes need a sign in order to know that we are still in God’s will. That God is still with us and we are still being used by God. I just posted a piece on Mother Teresa and she had been looking for a sign before her death.

But what if the confirmation or sign from God is that things will continue to get more difficult and more humbling than we expected? The opposite of what we wanted? What if the confirmation or sign is that God is with us in our lonely/hard places, but things will remain hard and lonely? What if the confirmation or sign is our manger?

When our plans are falling apart, our lives feel unimportant and we are hoping for something better/easier, perhaps we are exactly where God wants us to be. That is what I have to accept and Mother Teresa had to accept, but it is sometimes difficult to accept that God knows best, but we must.

So as I grief over my weakness and disappointments, I recall the manger. My suffering is not pretty. It’s painful and humbling, but with the Holy Spirit's help I can still glorify God.

God can use our pain and humiliation to bring him the greatest glory. God’s kingdom does not operate as our earthly kingdom does: “The last shall be first, the weak shall be strong, and the foolish shall shame the wise.” Those are strange principles for humans, but strange or not that is what Christians are called to accept as a way of life.  

I am called with the help of the Holy Spirit to show strength to others in this time of weakness. I am called to show that I can maintain faith in these times of trials. I am called to demonstrate that I still have hope. I am called to allow God to use me in spite of my circumstances the same as Mary and Mother Teresa.

Losing my temper, replying with unkind words, being impatient does not help me or others and it certainly prevents God from using me. So, this Christmas season and every day that follows I will try harder than I have in recent months to be what God wants me to be while continuing to look for a sign that God still has a use for me.